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Step 1
How to begin
Choose a calm time, focus on specific concerns, and listen without shaming. Avoid arguing about labels. If immediate danger is present, contact emergency services.
- Write down substances, medications, and health concerns
- Gather insurance information if available
- Ask the provider what to bring
- Make a plan for transportation and follow-up
Step 2
Support for you
Family members may benefit from counseling, peer groups, and education even if their loved one is not ready for treatment. Supporting someone does not require accepting unsafe behavior.
Step 3
Starting the conversation
Pick a time when your loved one is not intoxicated or in withdrawal. Describe specific things you have seen and how they affect you, using "I" statements. For example: "I was scared when you drove home last night." Listen, and avoid shaming, threats, or debates about labels.
One conversation rarely settles everything. It is normal to come back to the topic several times.
Step 4
Setting boundaries
Boundaries describe what you will and will not do. They are not punishments. Examples include not giving money that may be used for substances, not covering for missed work, and not allowing use in your home. Decide on boundaries you can keep, and explain them calmly.
Step 5
Support for you
Caring for someone with a substance use problem can be exhausting. Al-Anon offers meetings for people affected by someone else's drinking. Nar-Anon offers meetings for people affected by someone else's drug use. Both have in-person and online options. The SAMHSA National Helpline (1-800-662-4357) offers free, confidential referral information 24 hours a day.
Step 6
7-OH products and young people in New York
Concentrated 7-OH products, related to kratom, have been sold in convenience stores and smoke shops. Addiction professionals have raised concern about how easy these products are to buy in New York. If you find these products, talk openly with your loved one and mention them to any healthcare provider.
Information to gather before calling a provider
- Substances used, including kratom or 7-OH products, and how often
- Current medications and health conditions
- Any past treatment or withdrawal experiences
- Insurance information, if available
- Transportation and who can help with follow-up
Related guides
Continue reading: understand what detox may involve for your loved one · compare programs with a practical checklist · explore recovery support and next steps
Sources and further reading
- Support for families and friends of people who drink (Al-Anon)
- Support for families affected by drug use (Nar-Anon)
- The Dangers of 7-OH and Why Accessibility in New York Raises Concerns (ISSUP)
- National Helpline (SAMHSA)
Links are provided for education and do not imply endorsement of this site. Medical information should be reviewed with a qualified professional. See all authoritative sources.